Monday, September 5, 2011

What will I be when I grow up?

For years I have went back and forth on different career choices. I married at a very young age,16, and we began having children pretty quickly. By the time we were married 1 year, I was already 7 months pregnant with our 1st son, Christian Jr. Back then all I can remember wanting out of life was to be a wife and a mother. I didn't waste any time becoming just that!
I have been married for 16 years now and have 4 beautiful children (also several children I have "adopted" as my own). I am not any closer to making a decision on a career than I was 16 years ago. What I do know is that I have a heart for today's youth. I see so many children who are raising themselves while their parents try to work just to put food on the table and keep a roof over there head, sometimes falling short with one or the other, maybe even both.
My husband and I know all too well what it takes to try and take care of a large family. Thank God we have a family that has been very supportive of me staying home to raise our children. We have not raised our children completely on our own means or I would have never been able to stay at home. No, it has not always been a walk in the park but it has allowed us to be more involved in our children's lives and me to be the mother I always dreamed of being. This life style couldn't work for everyone but I am thankful for all the time I have been given to be a part of my children's lives.
I have been a substitute teacher for the past 10 1/2 years which has also allowed me to be at school while my kids are in school and to see just who their friends are. It has opened up another way for me to be completely involved in their education as well to see who they spent their time with away from home. Being a substitute teacher has also showed me that not only are my kids important but I also have grown to love helping all children.
All this leads me to this question, what will I be when I grow up? I have been to the community college here in the town I live in. My first time I went to be a Nail Technician. Long story short, I much rather GET my nails done then DO someone's! My second time around I went for Microcomputer Specialist, which I LOVED but I ended up having to take a break because my husband had to go out of town to work. I have time to go back now but not so sure that is what I really want to do. I love working on computers and doing office work but I much rather just spend time with my kids.
I have a Wednesday night children's group that I teach at my church. We have been attending there regularly for a little over 2 years now. The more time I spend there teaching children about God's love, the more I am convinced that I should be doing something in the church. I am eager to learn more about Christ and in turn share EVERYTHING that I am learning with someone else.
When I was a part of a youth group and started going through certain things, I was made to feel unwelcome and had nowhere else to turn. I was left to figure things out for myself. It was a horrible feeling to be abandon by a group of people I loved so much. As I have been working the youth of my church and our community I really see a need to show these kids love. No matter what they are going through, they need someone to tell them they are loved. God sent Jesus to die for us, His only son. What an act of love from our Heavenly Father.
I am not sure if there is such a career but I will strive to find it. It might be in the form of a counselor or maybe even a children/youth pastor, and I will strive to seek God to show me the way. No matter how old we get, it is never too late to become exactly what God intended us to be.
Lord, pave the way for me. I ask that you open the doors necessary for me to become exactly what you want me to be. I want the youth of this community to be touched by you and if you see fit for me to be a vessel, use me. Show me the way...